There are a lot of benefits to being a goal orientated person. When I set my mind to something I throw my energy into it to give it my best shot, which is more often than no rewarded in some way or other (whether it be through success or successfully learning a lesson).
Here’s the thing. All of my goal-directed energy was pointed in one direction as I finished my Masters. Aside from the mental aspects, a lot of emotional energy went into it too. As someone who loves having a goal, the structure of uni fits me perfectly. You’ve got the big goal of finishing your degree, and then all of the little goals in between to actually get there ranging from writing 1000 words of my assignment in a day, to completing my thesis with time to spare.
Although I am excited to have finished my degree so well, I now have a lot of extra energy that needs to be channeled elsewhere. Don’t get me wrong, full-time work is taking up a lot of mental energy and time. But there is just something missing when answering the occasional email is the only thing you have to do outside of work hours. As sad as it sounds, I didn’t realise how much the feeling of needing to be studying all the time had become such a reliable, close companion. Although being back together with real friends is undoubtedly my preference (they give much better advice about my disastrous love life — let’s just say he definitely loves me not), there is still a part of me which doesn’t quite know how to fill the space my internal study buddy left behind.
Whilst my next project will definitely not be quite as big as my Masters (for now), it hasn’t taken me long to realise that I have to channel my extra energy in specific directions, lest it run wild (for example, letting it go into my aforementioned love life is NOT a good idea). For now, I’m directing into smaller projects – supporting business development in my workplace, running, recalibrating, travelling, reconnecting… until my next big project becomes clear. In amongst the many, many things that last year taught me about myself, learning to acknowledge my own propensity to need a project has been a slower lesson, but one that has helped my identify why I have struggled in the past and hopefully given me enough awareness to avoid those problems in the future.
There are so many things that I want to do that I often don’t know where to start. But I figure that sometimes you’ve got to take a few little steps before you take some more big ones.
What projects are you focusing your energy on at the moment? I would love for you to share in the comments below.